Victorian? What does that mean?

So far my knowledge of Victorian England exists of appearance for appearances sake.  No one was allowed to act out, show leg, or say the wrong thing.  Of course, this lends itself to the theory of the preacher's child being the wildest of the bunch.  From the reading however, I've noticed a HUGE difference in the class system.  As I read, I feel both wealthy and snobby as well as dirty and hungry.  There are the dark scenes when I need a bath or I think I smell sewage.  Then I move to happier times with servants, food, and uncomfortable clothing.  I don't like Victorian England.  I want to read my Kindle and not worry about who I know. 

I also like being an independent woman.  Even by today's, and I mean my mother's standards, I am far behind where I should be in the southern woman's role.  After reading Dickens, I am no where near unfortunate.  These women cross roles by being the mother, sister, daughter, and caregiver.  They are either married to men who can afford to support them or they are unfortunate souls left to fend for themselves.  There is the middle, like Wilfer's wife, who is married to a man who can provide but not to the extent that Veneering can.  I would never make it as a housewife.  I would probably have blood on my hands.

Now I've been in college for ... years.  I love being in class.  Does it stressful? Yes.  Is it expensive? Yes.  But I have the freedom to get an education for as long as my little heart, and wallet, desires.  The Victorians seem to have quite a gap.  Charley secretly educates himself so that his father won't get angry.  Boffins hires someone to help him with his education and Bella could care less about learning.  She just wants a rich man to put her up for life.  I could not imagine living in a world where education was frowned upon in such a way.